Adult Dating and the Simple Safeguards to Take

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by: jon1411joyce
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Date: Fri, 4 Feb 2011 Time: 3:23 AM
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As the web expands into human relationships and dating, it is in your best interest to exercise caution.

The Web has become the hot new place for smart, eligible people to find romance, and those looking for love are swarming into cyberspace. As a result, many individuals have begun relationships online with people they have not met and know little about.

With so many people communicating via the Net and deciding to date virtual strangers, it is critical to be safe and be smart. Use your common sense. Follow these guidelines and you are off to a good start:

If it looks like it's too good to be true, then it is!.
Take advantage of electronic mail or chat or facebook to get a feel first. Be vigilant in noticing unusual behavior or inconsistencies. If someone is evasive, this is a red flag. "Pay attention" to your correspondent's words. The person at the other end may not be who or what he/she says. Go with your instincts. If you are not comfortable at the start, the best thing is to walk right away.

Find out as much information as you can.
Be as inquisitive as you can. Do a check list on your side to get basic info on things like where he works or where he grew up. These are clues to finding out who this person really is. If you detect hesitancy in giving personal info, then that is a red flag. Probe any discrepancies in their stories. As you ask your questions, if you see that there is hesitancy in getting the answers, be careful. Always err on the side of safety.

Honesty is the key to success.
You should describe yourself as accurately as you can. Exaggerating or deceiving is easy on the web. Be honest about the basic things such as marital status and how you look. You can start by exchanging pics. If someone is unwilling to send a recent photo, this is warning sign. If you don't get that picture after making several requests, then it's yet another red flag. In today's digital age, coming up with a picture is a no brainer. When you have each other's pics, continue to get more info so that both side will have an accurate total picture. Keep it honest.

Take it to the next level by talking on the telephone.
A phone call can tell a lot about a person's communication and social skills. It's worth it to call since you can continue to get a more complete profile. But do not give out your phone number to a stranger. Take your time to see if a trusting bond is there. Provide them your phone number only when you gain that feeling of comfort.

No need to rush.
Setting up a date after just meeting anyone online is both stupid and dangerous. Take time to find out who this person really is. If someone is pressuring you to get together before you are ready, this is another warning sign. If anything feels strange as you get to know this person, then it is time to back away and look for another match.

If there are no red flags and you decide to meet, just proceed with care and dictate the terms of the initial meeting. The following is a guide to make sure that you have a safe encounter:

1. Make sure a friend or anyone close to you knows where you are going and when you will be back from this first date. Make sure you give them your date's full name and contact numbers just in case. For a small fee, you can leave information regarding where you are going and all the pertinent details with a service called SmartDate at smartdate-dot-com. If your date wants you to keep it secret, this is a very big red flag. Your safety above all else!
2. Keep the location of the first date in a public place. It must be where there are other folks and preferably well lit. Getting together for coffee is a pleasant, casual way to get to know someone.
3. Never allow yourself to be picked up from your house. For obvious reasons, letting a stranger know where you live is not to your best interest. Try to have your own transportation, so if it does not work, your exit strategy is simpler.
4. On this first date, reconcile what your date told you online to see if he was honest to begin with. This is like an audit, it you find he lied online, move on.
5. Do not bring your date back to your house after the first meeting. You do not know this person. Let your common sense rule.

Exercise caution. Take control of your future. Know what you are getting into before you invest your heart, money, or your life. Information about the other person is the key!

About the Author

Jon is a retiree who is trying her hand in technology by doing web marketing, and is having fun setting up a varied assortment of sites, so if you are looking for the latest hot toys for the kids or if you are looking for a fun toy yourself (ahem .. say a rabbit vibrator), come visit her sites!